New Year, Old Me! 2017 • Begin When You’re Ready!

I’ve been gone for a few months, recouping…

2016 hit me harder than I expected… slightly dramatic but honestly speaking…

Last year I spent a lot of time thinking, thinking about the  plans I wanted to put into action and celebrating other people’s projects and successes. Then I had to pause for a quick second and ask myself what on earth am I doing?
Not the celebrating others part but the daydreaming and over thinking.
I’d put way too much pressure on myself, overanalysing, worrying, procrastinating and projecting onto others. I realised I had spent months and months living vicariously through other creatives I respected, deluding myself into thinking that their success was mine; (though philosophically speaking it’s positive to have such a mindset as creatives. ) but no?!

I had preoccupied myself with so many other things, hoarding and cleaning around the tidy organised pile I had created purposely, to begin working on.
But I was afraid. Afraid of finally doing what I had always wanted to do, being myself to my highest autonomous sovereign standard, and expressing my truths with the tools I’d been gifted with.
Once I figured that out I had to deal with the state of panic my catastrophic thinking brain put me in!

I had to ask myself the following questions:

1: Who am I?
2:What do I love doing the most?
3:What are my strengths and weaknesses?
4:What talents do I have that I’d like to make use of?
5: How would you like to positively impact those around you with your gifts and ideas?
6: Okay cool, now what next, lets break it down!?

Fear of failing, of over sharing, of being judged, of being vulnerable, and even the strangest fear, of being the best version of me, of achieving what I know and others know I’m capable of!
Fear is a state of mind.
A mental programming that can trigger certain trauma responses causing you to Fight, Fly, Freeze or Fawn.
Fear can lead to anxiety and depression, and we rarely talk about how easily one can slip into a state of mind that can be so detrimental to your health and wellbeing.
Especially as artists, creatives and intuitive persons; we feel in order to understand.

Once we being to tap into our emotions and assess them one by one, we can then tackle the mental coding embedded in our systems and decode rewire and rewrite them, in order to make the most out of life and use our gifts to the best of our abilities.

We must always try our best to practise the art of radical self care, we might think we are ready to dive in and takes laps in the ocean of life, but if we haven’t done the work internally, but put on a brave face externally, the cracks will start to show and the mess you left inside will begin to leak out…

There is no need to rush, YES, time is precious, but you must take it as slow as you need to and begin when you are ready!

Every time I lose focus I remember:
Aha m bu,  Obuineke Chisimdi Amaechi Onwukanjo
that’s Igbo for “My name is,
It is you who creates
God spoke me into being
Nobody knows tomorrow

Death is the only obstacle.

Daunting at times but very enlightening and reassuring.

I am a MultiDisciplinary Artist who designs, writes, sings, paints and teaches; {or}
A  Creative Instigator • Contextualizer • Curating modes of Communication

  • Creating narratives through brand identity
  • Curating culture and style
  • Critiquing the arts and humanities
  • Communicating concepts of wellbeing and self actualization

Quote of the month:

“When you do too much, nothing makes sense…
When you follow your calling, it all falls into place.” – ɒbʊhwi Amæɪchi

Photography by Jendella Benson

Here’s the mood so far this year, just outchea preeing January’s Juxtapostions…

See you soon!

xO

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *